I’m sharing this for several reasons, and none of them are about seeking sympathy. I share because someone out there might need to hear it, and maybe if you feel moved to pass it on, it could help another person reach out for support. I also share because I’m practicing being more authentic, more open, more visible – my persecution wound is healing.
I see so many people stuck in constant “doing” mode, desperately trying to keep up until they crash. I’ve sat with many in the midst of transformation, even what some might call a dark night. I’ve had clients hesitate to be honest, afraid I wouldn’t be able to “handle it” – yes, they’ve said this to me. So, to be clear:
I’m not interested in small talk. I don’t enjoy big crowds. I notice what many overlook. I feel almost everything. I’m easily overwhelmed by the daily energies and sensory input of life. I need plenty of time to decompress and recharge. Quiet moments, nature, water, and music soothe my soul. I’m spiritual and have had mystical experiences.
Does that sound like weakness? It’s anything but – it’s my greatest strength. I’ve been to the depths, sat with the darkness, felt the bleakness and uncertainty, cried until I thought I couldn’t cry anymore, and then released, layer after layer, until there was almost nothing left.
And there was little left. I’ve let go of most of my possessions, and much of my past. That lightness brings profound relief, even if it leaves an empty space – a clean slate, free from the conditioning, expectations, and projections of what came before.
I always knew I was a good therapist – heartfelt testimonials confirmed it – but doubt was a constant companion. That persecution wound was strong. Emerging from this latest descent has reminded me of my resilience, my strength, and my ability, with the right person, to help someone find their way through.
If any part of this resonates, let it be a reminder that vulnerability is not failure and sensitivity is not something to hide. There is strength in slowing down, in telling the truth about where you are, and in letting yourself be supported. And if you’re in the middle of your own descent right now, please know this: you do not have to find your way through alone.